Missing Links

Hi,

My story is a little different but I relate to 80% of this. I am the result of a one night stand. I have never known my father.

I have never had a stepdad, an uncle or granddad. Or any male role models. Just me and my mum.

I experience all of this! Wondering about your genetic history, the confusion! The feeling different. The anger!

I find that I continually grieve for the father I didn’t have. For the missing links. My half brothers and sisters which may or may not exist! For my grandma and granddad.

I have all these questions:
– Did they know about me?
– Would they want to know about me?
– Were there other one night stand children?
– Will I accidentally bump into them?
– Will I accidentally sleep with them?

I have very strong feelings regarding sperm and egg donation. I do not feel that this is something you can donate. I do not understand why anyone would choose to separate out genetics when you consider all the hideous consequences that can occur!
I have had a really rough time as I am bisexual. A lot of my friends are young lesbians and to them sperm donation is a wonderous way to go. Hard to fit as I feel this practice is very wrong. Whenever I have discussed it either with gay or straight people – I have been shouted down and told it doesn’t exist. That my thing is not a thing and if it is then it wouldn’t be the same for a donor conceived person. A donor conceived person would not experience any feelings of loss or confusion about their identity.

Well, surprise surprise! Here we go a website full of people who feel exactly the same bloody way!!!!